A Man Loved by All

Bill passed away at 5:00 pm yesterday, after being at home for just over a week with hospice care. Although his passing is devastating to family and friends, we can all have peace that he is not longer in pain. His pain got so bad yesterday that they were giving him morphine every two hours. No one should have to endure that kind of suffering.

It seems that every time I am around someone who only has a few hours left to live, they wait until everyone leaves the room to finally let go. This is precisely what Bill did yesterday. He waited until Rich made his first trip out of the house in days to come home and visit Evan for his birthday, Beth and Angela left to pick up some more medicine for him at CVS, and Carol went to the kitchen to get some coffee. No sooner than Rich walked in the door, Beth called and said that Bill was going. We all rushed out the door to drive the hour back to Bill and Carol's, but Bill was already gone. I hope that everyone who had stepped out for a short time can have peace knowing that Bill was ready to go and wanted for this to happen out of everyone's sight.

We all find comfort in knowing that all seven of Bill's children were able to make the trip to see him before he left this world. I have so much admiration for the unbelievable support each of them had for each other, their dad, and for Carol. Rich never left his dad's side for more than a few minutes at a time and had to do things that only someone with his strength and determination could do to keep Bill comfortable. Although each child made it to see their father, Rich and Angela were there day in and day out to help Carol and comfort their dad and not once complained about staying up all night and all day, only sleeping when Bill was sleeping. I hope that they realized how special they are and what strength it took to do what they did. I hope that Rich is around to take care of me when I get old and gray because his compassion is like none other. I love this man more than words can describe and in large part due to the fact that he had such a loving, supportive father who raised him to be the man that he is today.

Carol has showed more strength than I thought was possible out of one person. She was an amazing loving wife and I'm so thankful that she and Bill were able to spend the many years that they did together. She is blessed with having so many wonderful memories of her time with Bill, from the yearly Christmas parties, to their numerous cruises, to their amazing honeymoon in Italy, to their purchase of the camper which they were able to use to vacation with all their pets in tow, to their love of Corona and Southern Comfort, to their side by side work remodeling their home.

Although we know Bill is not longer with us in body, his spirit will never be forgotten. I won't ever forget those hysterical stories that Bill seemed to tell me over and over again about his best canine friend, Max. "Did I ever tell you about how Max could peel and orange with his teeth? Did I ever tell you about the time that we had to give Max away and he escaped and ran all the way back home? Did I ever tell you about how Max could count? or how Max could walk along the top of a 6 foot fence?" Bill and Max were certainly two peas in a pod:)

We will certainly feel a void each time we walk into Carol's house and don't hear Bill say, "Hey Boy!" or "God damn it, Boy didn't I tell you..." or "Carol, I know you threw that away when you were cleaning!" It will be hard to get used to the kitchen cabinets and dresser drawers being shut and not left wide open for us to run into. Rich definitely inherited this trait from his father:) The blue recliner will forever remind us of Bill's favorite resting spot and the kitchen knives that are razor sharp will remind us of Bill's love of cooking and his obsession with keeping those knives in tip top working order. Again, Rich has followed in his father's footsteps with this one! I'll miss the "arguments" about politics, religion, math problems, engineering, etc. that Bill would engage in over dinner. I often opted out of these, but he and Rich and Randy could go round and round for hours:) Lucky for all of us, we can always take a look at Rich's "nubs" (fingers) to remember what Bill's hardworking, years of carpentry, hands looked like. And, we can take a look at Bobby, Ted and Rich's ears to remember those distinct Stokes ears;) I'm hoping that Rich can continue to immitate Bill's infectious high pitched belly laugh..."hehehe" for years to come. These are just a few of my favorite Bill memories, but there are hundreds more.

Bill, you were one of a kind, who everyone loved, and you will always hold a special place in our hearts and you will be dearly missed.

Thank you to everyone who has supported Bill's family with thoughts and prayers and will continue to do so as we celebrate Bill's life.

(March 19, 1946 - July 30, 2010)